THIS POST SUCKS
I had to look up my password to this blog. I haven’t written for a while and I haven’t totally missed it. I’m back in school and there are so many things on my mind and sometimes I can’t get over the fact that the blog is called “Reluctantly Moving to LA” when I am [...]
read more
KNOCKED UP AROUND PALM TREES
I am trying to picture myself pregnant in LA. Shopping carts; heat; white lines on pavement; strolling carts; beach options; family. Often people say they want to be buried in a certain place. It’s probably where they should live. I used to tell my boyfriend, “Don’t you dare bury me in Los Angeles. Please bury me on [...]
read more
WHAT IS SEX?
Something I haven’t done lately. Do you ever look at a couple and picture them having sex? I do it all the time. I just did it. I’m sitting in the Second Stop Cafe again and there’s this nice Jewish couple (I just know they are Jewish) and I’m watching them to talk to each [...]
read more
MOVING BACK TO NYC AND FUCKING THINGS UP AGAIN
I’m sitting in the Second Stop Cafe in Williamsburg, Brooklyn writing on a napkin. A big, brown paper towel/napkin. I’m checking my shoulder ’cause my boyfriend may walk in and mess up this writing. Why would he mess it up? ‘Cause I’m trying to write this blog again. As you see, I stopped writing this [...]
read more
Life
MOVING BACK TO NYC AND FUCKING THINGS UP AGAIN
I’m sitting in the Second Stop Cafe in Williamsburg, Brooklyn writing on a napkin. A big, brown paper towel/napkin. I’m checking my shoulder ’cause...
Los Angeles
MERRY CHRISTMAS. BOOTCAMP BABY.
My mind is pumping, my breath is pant-y and I’m on the edge of picking a fight with my boyfriend. Yeah, I just took a Barry’s Bootcamp Class. Fuck yeah....
Relationships
KNOCKED UP AROUND PALM TREES
I am trying to picture myself pregnant in LA. Shopping carts; heat; white lines on pavement; strolling carts; beach options; family. Often people say they want to be buried...
Sex
WHAT IS SEX?
Something I haven’t done lately. Do you ever look at a couple and picture them having sex? I do it all the time. I just did it. I’m sitting in the Second...
-
THIS POST SUCKS
January 16, 2012 08:01 -
KNOCKED UP AROUND PALM TREES
October 25, 2011 14:10 -
WHAT IS SEX?
August 14, 2011 07:08 -
MOVING BACK TO NYC AND FUCKING THINGS UP AGAIN
August 13, 2011 20:08 -
MERRY CHRISTMAS. BOOTCAMP BABY.
December 25, 2010 13:12
-
admin:
Thank you, Damian! -
Damian:
Jamie, Happy New Year! (Late, I know.) Your post was deep. And h -
NY LA:
I check 'single'. That's what I am now anyway, right? -
NY LA:
A beautiful homage to an amazing city. Thank you. I understand and empathize -
Eddie Pardovani:
Wow, are we in NYC glad to see Jamie Sneider back! We have really missed you!
Recent Articles
THIS POST SUCKS
I had to look up my password to this blog. I haven’t written for a while and I haven’t totally missed it. I’m back in school and there are so many things on my mind and sometimes I can’t get over the fact that the blog is called “Reluctantly Moving to LA” when I am [...]
KNOCKED UP AROUND PALM TREES
I am trying to picture myself pregnant in LA. Shopping carts; heat; white lines on pavement; strolling carts; beach options; family. Often people say they want to be buried in a certain place. It’s probably where they should live. I used to tell my boyfriend, “Don’t you dare bury me in Los Angeles. Please bury me on [...]
WHAT IS SEX?
Something I haven’t done lately. Do you ever look at a couple and picture them having sex? I do it all the time. I just did it. I’m sitting in the Second Stop Cafe again and there’s this nice Jewish couple (I just know they are Jewish) and I’m watching them to talk to each [...]
MOVING BACK TO NYC AND FUCKING THINGS UP AGAIN
I’m sitting in the Second Stop Cafe in Williamsburg, Brooklyn writing on a napkin. A big, brown paper towel/napkin. I’m checking my shoulder ’cause my boyfriend may walk in and mess up this writing. Why would he mess it up? ‘Cause I’m trying to write this blog again. As you see, I stopped writing this [...]
MERRY CHRISTMAS. BOOTCAMP BABY.
My mind is pumping, my breath is pant-y and I’m on the edge of picking a fight with my boyfriend. Yeah, I just took a Barry’s Bootcamp Class. Fuck yeah. I feel like tearing off the head of a tiger and feeding it to my puppy. No, scratch that. I’ll tear off the head of [...]
DRAGONFLY COCK RINGS
Immediately after I began dating my boyfriend last year I met a female friend of his, who shortly after being introduced, joked about having a threesome with my boyfriend and me. She wasn’t toxic, although that sounds terribly toxic; she was fun and she had a boyfriend who was kinda’ famous. I wasn’t sure if she [...]
DIVORCED IS A PERMANENT STATUS AND OTHER SHORT STORIES
When you get divorced, you want it over. You don’t want to be married anymore, that’s the point. You feel tarnished, socially embarrassed and like a failure, but that’s your opinion and you really don’t want anyone else’s. I find that forms remind me of my divorce. I went to the dentist recently and the [...]
ART SCHOOL AND PERIODS IN PROVENCE
It’s been a long time since I’ve written. I’ve drafted many posts, but haven’t had the time to post them. My focus has been on applying to graduate school. I just made the decision to not apply to any creative writing MFA programs. I feel as though my head wants to go, but my heart [...]
DRAPER’S WORLD
Is it wrong to think of Donald Draper while having sex? Yes, yes it is. Is it so expected — like women, like cupcakes. I picture it long. Not like a garden snake, but a boa – long and think, swervy and slick, searching and smart – and inside me. “Jamie, no, no…”, I chided [...]
TIGHTY WHITIES TURN ME ON
Okay, maybe not white, but tight-fitted underwear severly turns me on. I think tighty whities turn on a lot of girls, but they don’t know it. I didn’t know it until I dated “David.” (His name isn’t David, it’s Don, but I want to preserve his anonymity.) David was 10 years older than me and [...]
PUSSY WIDTH
I’m feeling raunchy today at 3:30 pm. I’m full of trail mix and “healthy soda” from Whole Foods. My boyfriend is at PETCO getting food for our puppy. I’m thinking about raping him. I just dried my hair and put on a little makeup and I want to wait by the door and pounce on [...]
THERE’S NOTHING BETTER THAN WAKING UP WITH AN ORGASM
Every Friday morning I wake up thinking “shut the fuck up” and I know who I’m talking to. I’m talking to this woman who I can’t see, but can only imagine. She’s probably average weight, has carrot-red hair and white under-vegetable eaten skin, yellowing teeth, wears granny-sweaters and is 43 years old. Is it wrong [...]