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PREGNANT IN LA
March 17, 2012 09:03 -
MY TRIP TO LA
March 17, 2012 07:03 -
THE HENRY SOFA
March 10, 2012 18:03 -
THIS POST SUCKS
January 16, 2012 08:01 -
KNOCKED UP AROUND PALM TREES
October 25, 2011 14:10
Archive for the ‘Jewish Calendar’ Category
MAKING JEWISH PLAYBOY CALENDAR IS…HARD
I know it may sound ridiculous, but I have made an Excel spreadsheet, three Word documents and an image folder for this Jewish calendar. It should be ready by early August. When I came up with the idea I thought it would be a piece of cake, but I want it to be good, and [...]
GOOD SHABBOS! THANK GOD IT’S FRIDAY!!!
WHO’S PSYCHED FOR SHABBAT? I am! I am! Were these cookies not made for this photo shoot!? OR WHAT? I’m actually turned on by my own pictures – is that bad? I eroticize sugar, and when I think of cupcakes, cookies and cake, I just wanna have sex! If there was a cupcake at the [...]
DUH DUH…DUH DUH…I’LL BITE YOUR HEAD OFF!
IS THAT A SHARK??? No! It’s my attitude at this “time” of the month. I’ll make no bones about it. I’m a tough cookie. I want chocolate, and I want it now! You want to hang out? No! Cause I don’t feeeeel good. Don’t make fun of me, or I’ll bite your head off. Is [...]
FACEBOOK CENSORSHIP
This is an unexpected post about how I am peeved/angry/scared/nervous/confused about why Facebook censored my pictures. I didn’t post naked pictures, it was a picture of two matzoh balls covering my boobs. Like a bikini. It showed some cleavage cause a matzoh ball doesn’t cut it in size to fully cover them. I feel like [...]
GOOD SHABBOS!!! I MADE MATZOH BALL SOUP!!!
OH, HI THERE! I didn’t see you… What am I doing this Shabbat? Cooking up some Matzoh Ball soup. I like to sit down with a nice hot bowl of matzoh ball soup. (Even if it is 100 degrees in LA.) Have a wonderful night and a restful day. L’Chaim!
MATZOH BALL SHOOT GOES HORRIBLY WRONG!!!
Okay, I know this may look horribly gross, and the ASPCA might question my mothering abilities, but I HAVE THREE THINGS TO TELL THEM: 1. Because I am the mother of my kittens, that makes them Jewish, and because they are Jewish, they love a good matzoh ball soup. WHO AM I TO PREVENT THEM [...]
DAD DOESN’T EXACTLY UNDERSTAND POINT OF BLOG
I just told my Dad about this blog. I kinda steered him away from looking at it. (I did write about his balls in an earlier post and he’d probably be mad.) “Why don’t you write about how you met Steve Wozniak and you were a test user for Apple? Tell them that you used [...]
MICROKITTEN PACKS A BIG MEOW!
Can we say HOLY SHIT? While researching possible bikini’s for my calendar – I BECAME DELUSIONAL! It’s difficult to stay in normal swimsuit land if you google “bikini.” I vacillated between porn sites and regular swimsuit sites. In the 11th hour, I came upon MICROKITTEN, and in my delusional state asked myself, “Is that too [...]
GOOD SHABBOS!
Hi All! Have a wonderful Shabbat evening! Okay, I know it’s only Thursday night, but I was feeling EXTRA JEWISH, so I thought I’d start Shabbat early. I don’t think that’s allowed though… I asked myself before I posted these pictures, “Is this a good idea?“ And I kept coming up with, “No. No. No, it’s [...]
JEWISH PLAYBOY PHOTO SHOOT IN THE WORKS!
The brainstorming has begun!!! (Well, it began with my non-Jewish husband who is not a good gage of what is offensive and what is funny. “Maybe I’ll dress up with a tail and devil ears -and wear a big witch nose,” I said, totally joking. He responded “DO IT!” So…I can’t quite rely on his opinion…) [...]
BEING A JEWISH PLAYGIRL AND STARTED WRITING A THING ABOUT WASTING TIME AND MARRIAGE
I started writing a short doo-dad/maybe a film about time wasting. It’s about getting married and feeling lost. Depression is such a silly word. It feels like it encompasses feelings below level 4. It’s a bucket of many images and thoughts, but it’s negative and I call it depression. It’s for me, more like cloudiness [...]
THE LAST TIME WE HAD SEX. (From Jewcy.com)
The last time my husband and I had sex after we separated, I wore a Chai pendant necklace and he had on a Saint-somebody necklace. We were doing it missionary-style and his Saint was dangling next to my Chai. I didn’t want to point out the ridiculousness of our new necklaces, and the fact that [...]