ZUMBA AND SHAKIRA

I like the two words “Zumba” and “Shakira.” They remind me of David Letterman’s, “Oprah, Uma. Uma, Oprah.” This morning I took my first Zumba class. I’ve been wondering about “Zumba”, and since I am trying to get out of my paralyzing comfort-zone, I decided to check it out. I’m also trying to religiously go [...]

DATE PARALYZES ME & SEX WITH MY GYM CRUSH

Hi Folks, I am sitting at my desk eating cookies and thinking about the last week. I have to say, I feel selfish writing about myself at such a unifying and historic time, but I can’t stand looking at my last post about spanking and my birthday. It’s kind of ridiculous. So, why haven’t I [...]

HUSBAND IS PISSED ABOUT SECRET GYM CRUSH!

Okay, what I think is funny is actually starting to hurt my husband’s feelings. I am going to stop writing posts about my secret-crush gym-trainer. It’s not as if they aren’t true, but they aren’t nice. My secret-crush will no long be a topic on this site. I am filing him away under “in my [...]

I HAVE BEEN WORKING MY ASS OFF FOR THE JEWISH CALENDAR! I HAVE THE ASS OF A 4-YEAR OLD!

Is that hot? Is it hot to have the ass of a 4-year old? “You have such a tiny ass,” my husband said last night as I purposely dove down naked, slathered with self-tanner. “Thanks,” I said, “I want it really, really tiny!” And then we had sex. JUST KIDDING ABOUT THE SEX PART!!! I [...]

MY HUSBAND TOTALLY MESSED UP MY CHANCE WITH MY GYM CRUSH AND HE WON’T EVEN APOLOGIZE!!!

There is a trainer at my gym who is deliciously hot. He’s not this huge beefcake. He has a subtle Midwestern beauty. He’s a cutie pie. I glare at him while I workout. I whisper to him with eyes, “I like you soo much. Do you like me?“ and I wonder if he knows that [...]

DAILY FLIRT WITH THE HOTTEST TRAINER AT EQUINOX GYM!!!